Dear Sam, today you started school. You are 4 and a half years old now – over a year older than you should have been when you began your school journey. I spent the morning telling you over and over that you were going to school after lunch. You smiled, you flapped, you jumped up and down with excitement! You said “oooool” (school).

Dear Sam…

I sang you the school song I made up. (To the tune of we’re all going to the Zoo tomorrow). “Sam Sam’s going to school today, school today, school today… Sam Sam’s going to school today – hip hip hip hooray. He’s going to school, school, school… It’ll be cool, cool, cool… he’ll follow the rule, rule, rule, he’s going to school, school, school.” You giggled, hugged me, jumped, rocked and looked like the most excited child I’d ever seen.

When I told you it was time to put on your new school uniform, you grabbed my hand and lead me downstairs to the playroom to get changed.

I wanted to get lots of photos of you looking nice and smart in your uniform, but you had other ideas. I managed to get a couple of blurry snaps before you lead me to the front door and said, “oool… oool… oool… car” – It’s safe to say you were looking forward to your first day! This was the best photo I managed to get!

Dear Sam - First day at school

It was raining out, but the journey was quicker than expected. Too quick – we were 40 minutes early! I decided to go for a drive before getting to the school – this displeased you, Sam.

Dear Sam, You got a little impatient in the car, but cheered up once inside the school.

Your teacher came out to meet us at reception, and you were a little grumpy to begin with. When she said hello to you, you ignored her. I asked you to say hello, and you said “Ewwo… Ewwo” – good listening, buddy!

You then held my hand nicely, and walked all the way to your classroom. It’s a fair old walk, but you were brilliant all the way around. When the classroom door was opened, you let go of my hand and ran straight in! Not even a second glance my way!

I picked you up almost 2 hours later, and you didn’t look very happy to see me. Your Teaching Assistant told me you’d explored the classroom and taken a big interest in the 3D shapes. You didn’t join in much with the group activities, and weren’t as talkative as last time you visited. You have got a cough though, so I am assuming it was down to that.

Your T.A. said you said “ummy” and were looking for me at one point, but you carried on exploring once told I’d be back later.

When I got you back into the car and told you it was time to go home, you started to cry and scream. I am taking that as a sign that you enjoyed your first school session!

Dear Sam… Tomorrow, you’re in for the same 1.20-3.10pm session. Then next week, you’ll be doing 11.30-3.20pm, then fingers crossed you’ll be in full time the week after that.

It’s been a long time coming, but I am so proud of how well your first day went!

This morning, you accidentally smacked me over the head with a wooden game. Then when I said “Ouch”, you cuddled up beside me and stroked my face, gently. You may not have all the words yet to tell people how you feel, but you have mastered showing the people closest to you everything you need to.

I am so proud of you. You’ve become such a character recently. You have got me wrapped well and truly round your finger now, and you take great pleasure in leading me around the house to join you in whatever room you want to sit in. It’s no secret that you spend hours sat on my knee, or by my side. You shout me at 4am so I will keep you company in your room until it’s time to get up.

Dear Sam, you hum the same tunes over and over and over again. I still haven’t worked out what your newest one is. I think it could be one you’ve made up. It’s beautiful though.

Your cuddles are one of my favourite things in the world. You throw your arms around me now, and squeeze like your life depends on it. You love it when we squeeze you back, too. Your hugs are healing – I’m sure of it. I feel my mood lift every time you hug me.

Your smile is infectious. I am yet to meet anyone who fails to return your huge, beautiful grin when you lock eyes with them. Your eyes are huge, and captivating. It’s impossible to look away once I lock eyes with you.

Next Chapter

I am really excited for you. You’re entering the next stage in life. You’re going to blossom and develop in all kinds of ways.

You’ll be leaving your nursery next week though, and I know you’ll miss them. They’ve helped you so much, but you’re ready to start a new chapter now.

I am going to miss my little partner in crime. I have loved having you by my side from 11-3.30pm Monday to Friday these past few months. We’ve had some great adventures, we’ve learnt lots from each other, too.

This may not be the school journey we imagined you’d be having, but it is an amazing school with great facilities, where I am confident you’ll be very happy for the next 7 years.

Lots and lots of love, from Mummy xxx

Finally, if you enjoyed this post, check out more of our Autism blog posts here.

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