Today I’m sharing a post on ways to help foster children build resilience and self esteem. It was written by a foster parent. Having psychological needs attended to and a healthy self-esteem are important for all children if they are to grow up normally and become functioning adults. This is even more true for foster children who may have a history of undergoing various traumas, such as neglect and abuse.

Ways to Help Foster Children Build Resilience and Self-Esteem

As a foster parent, it is vital that you work closely with your support team at the foster agency to play your role in building life skills, overcoming fear, developing resilience, and becoming more sociable, confident, independent, and integrated into society. Below we look at how you can help your foster child develop these qualities.

How Confidence Impacts Resilience

Extreme self-doubt and low self-esteem can be a legacy from the foster child’s biological home and the circumstances the child lived under. As many foster children have been abused or neglected, this could have impacted their self-confidence and trust in others.

Without a healthy level of confidence, a child may feel unworthy and struggle with the vagaries of life despite being in a good foster home. Low resilience accompanies low confidence. This affects the growing child’s ability to make suitable life choices, such as what career to follow.

Here are a few ways you can help foster children in gaining self-confidence and acquiring resilience.

Teach them to Ask for Help

Nobody is an island separate from others and we all have to ask for assistance at times. Learning how to do this is an important skill. If your foster child needs help with an assignment for school and is unable to approach you for help with the difficulties they are having, the child will lack confidence in their ability to complete the task alone.

Personally, I find a great way to teach children it’s ok to ask for help is for you to ask them for help, too. Whether it’s showing you how to use your new phone, or helping clear the table, this is a great way to help foster children build self esteem.

The child will also be less resilient, as they are uncertain of the outcomes of not doing a good job and will probably not ask the teacher either. Have the talk, the one about you always being available for anything that concerns your foster child.

Whether your foster child is worried, afraid, experiencing challenges making friends, or falling behind on schoolwork, you are there to help them through it. Sometimes, all the child will need is someone trustworthy to open up to, and undoubtedly you want that person to be you. Provide the child with examples of when you needed help for various issues and asked someone for assistance.

Teach Your Foster Child Life Skills

Life skills will enable a foster child to find solutions to problems. This knowledge will provide them with the skills to tackle difficult tasks. Having life skills will boost confidence and self-esteem. Whether it’s how to clean their teeth, how to strip wallpaper, or how to tell the time, there’s plenty of things to learn.

Allow Your Foster Child to Fail

There are many life lessons and skill acquisition that come from dealing with failure. Your foster child must be allowed to experience failure and learn from it. This will cause their self-esteem and resilience to advance. You should still encourage the child to come to you after the failure so that you can help them explore options for a solution.

Work with the Foster Child’s Individual Care Plan

ISP Fostering have designed therapeutic fostering for all the children that they are responsible for. This includes an individual therapeutic care plan for each child, and it will provide a greater support circle to assist the foster child. Many foster children need additional support, including therapy. Make sure that you work alongside your professional network, such as a therapist, so your child receives the support they need.

With resilience and high self-esteem, your foster child will navigate the ups and downs of life with greater ease. Finally, let us know in the comments if you can think of any other ways to help foster children build resilience or self esteem.