This week, I discovered Kate on thin ice’s best boot forward linky. As someone who lives, let’s say a turbulent and unpredictable life, its hard to remain positive. I do try though, and am frequently found dusting myself off and carrying on. For that reason, the best boot forward linky spoke to me.
Best Boot Forward
I’m always glad of the chance to find something to be positive about, so I decided to join in. Rather than just adding Kate’s badge to a post, I thought I’d answer her optional 6 best boot forward questions… For week 1 at least…
1. How can you stop imagining the future will be rubbish?
I try not to think too far into the future. Life as a special needs mum is hard enough in the here and now. Thinking about what happens when I’m too old or poorly to look after Sam is a bit soul destroying, so I don’t go there very often.
I’m also a special needs sibling and have lost both parents too, so I am responsible for my siblings as well. The idea that Syd will also have this responsibility for Sam also hurts, so again… for now I don’t go there very often.
I am trying to be proactive though – Sam already gets regular respite, and is used to being in someone else’s care at times, so I guess on some level I’m already making steps to make the transition as painless as possible for Sam when the time comes.
2. Do you fancy visualising good stuff?
I try to, yes. Hubby’s deteriorating health has put a lot of pressure and stress on us both in recent years. We’ve made some big changes recently, and honestly I can finally see a bit of light at the end of the dark tunnel we’ve been navigating.
Visualising us all on a family holiday has definitely motivated me to keep on going and been the catalyst in my finally monetising my blog and taking some pressure off him.
3. When were you last in a sticky situation? How did you get out of it and what can you learn from that?
Jeez. So many to choose from. Hubby’s self employment means him being off sick isn’t an option, despite his doctor recommending he lighten the load. When you’re self employed and you’ve got a mortgage to pay, you can’t just go off sick. £92 a week Statutory Sick Pay wouldn’t cover half the mortgage. Time off means lost clients too.
After much discussion and brain storming… (Am I still allowed to say that, or is it not the done thing any more?) Hubby has reduced his hours massively, and is now studying for a new career better suited for his health. I have monetised my blog and am doing some freelance writing to cover the bills. It’s definitely taken some pressure off hubby. Additionally, it’ll mean we have a little disposable income each month to do some fun things with the kids.
What have I learnt from it? Being self employed and having a mortgage is a risky business.
4. What information do you need to gain in order to move forwards positively?
I don’t need any information… The bills being paid is more than enough for me to move forwards positively.
5. Who are the potential heroes that can help you right now?
Friends have helped massively recently. I have been under massive amounts of pressure from all sides. Not only with what’s been mentioned so far, but lots of other ways too, which aren’t my experiences to share here.
Suffice to say, I have found myself at the bottom of an extremely deep hole, and friends have been down there with me, holding the emotional ladder, listening to my ramblings and supporting me in ways they’ll never know.
Honestly I don’t think I’d be an almost fully functioning person right now if it weren’t for them, and I’m eternally grateful for each and every person who has helped, listened and reached out.
6. What are you hoping for?
Boredom. It sounds silly doesn’t it?! After spending my childhood moaning and whining to my parents about being bored, I’d love to have nothing to do or nothing to worry about right now.
I’d love for my little family to be in a position where we could take ourselves off on holiday and actually relax. I’m not asking for a fortnight in a tropical paradise… A weekend in a cabin in the woods would be perfect!
I’m working on it though. I am taking our youngest camping for a night at the end of the month, and all being well… I’ll take Sam at some point the week after. It’s not quite a log cabin, but it’ll be a much needed break from home.
So there you have it. My first best boot forward post.
Lastly, I’m also linking this Best Boot Forward post with #FabFridayPost too…